Locating Negativity That Hides Like A Fox

J E Roberson

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#1
I wanted to share my experience the topic of negativity. Since awareness is a strong foundation to change and growth I believe this is a worthy topic for those seekers who struggle to figure out when they are being negative until it erupts and its counter productive effect on life. Mainly negativity is an energy zapper that forces one to seek the energy of the environment and other people.

The reason a person would want to identify the being of negativity is because the person who fails to embody this descerment is much more likely to get on and stay on the negative path. What happens as a result is a negative explosion or outburst that seems random and with no prelude occurs.

The truth is a powerful negative expression weather that be a yelling episode, physical assault on others or depression in correlation to goals, it has come from a long trail of negative thoughts leading up to that moment. It is not 0-100 in that 1 moment, it is a build up and release at capacity.

You can prove this in your life by witnessing how much more flexible and forgiving you are when elated or full of positive feelings.

To get on the right path first off we must define negativity.

Negativity is the thought or action opposing your desired belief or results. Plain and simple if you are thinking or talking about a scenario you don't want in your life now or in the future you are being negative.

The biggest hurdle of a natural negative person is the saying "but its true". One wanting to shift their path must let go of truth for the realization of what may serve them in life.

For example, it may be true your bank account is low, it serves this person to instead think about the means to increase income or savings from income.

Although many subtle influences in society makes us feel like the best route for us as individuals is limited self belief and controlled confidence it does not serve you to play the Earth game at have speed or energy. If you started playing an arcade or video game and the first screen said would you like to play with full or half energy what would you pick?

Please share your thoughts on negativity.
 
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#2
Thanks for the great topic @J E Roberson,

I think that negativity can be turned into a useful tool. If you start to pay attention to what you talk about and think about, it will show you the direction you're heading towards in your life.

If you're aware of how often you complain about things, or look upon the outcome of things bleakly, you then have the ability to change those things into positive results.

What I have seen when it comes to overcoming negativity to achieve positive results, is that you must first take responsibility for the results you've gotten in your life up to this point currently.

To most people, responsibility is usually a despised thing to avoid. However, when I talk of responsibility, I'm really referring to this:

Response-ability; Your ability to respond to something.

When you fail to take responsibility, you are giving up your ability to respond to a certain outcome. If you have the ability to respond to something, that means you are able to change the outcome from that point onward.

Lastly, negativity can be all consuming and lead to any number of any given number of bad outcomes, while at the same time, being positive during a negative situation without taking action to change anything is an equally bad practice.

The key point that I'm trying to make here, is that simply being positive minded about a negative outcome or situation is only a temporary solution for dealing with negativity.

Negativity is just the built up result of denied responsibility. To be truly happy in life you must put into practice your ability to respond.

Thanks again @J E Roberson for opening this up for discussion, I'm interested in seeing other people's thoughts on the subject of negativity.
 

Toby Jensen

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#4
What you focus on expands. What you focus on expanding to change - changes. Focus on the outcome instead of getting stuck.
 
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#5
I'm actually going to play Devil's Advocate here and share a post I wrote, about why I gave up "positive thinking."

In my first teaching job, we always began the year by setting a goal. We would write this goal on an index card and place it in an envelope. Midway through the year, this goal would turn up in our mailbox, so that we could monitor our own progress.

This was kind of an inside joke between my aide and me, because we always had the same goal: to be more positive.

It wasn't that we didn't take our goal seriously or try to be positive. It's just that those pesky "negative" thoughts and words always crept in.

And it wasn't only at work that this was happening. I noticed negativity in my conversations, in my self-talk, and in my mood, in all aspects of my life. And during my last winter living in the house in Michigan, I launched an all-out effort to change it.

How did I change it? I got up early and recited a positive poem to begin my day. I wrote a gratitude list. I watched subliminal videos with positive affirmations on You Tube. I read books about positive thinking. I recited mantras throughout my day. I wrote a list of everything I hated about myself and turned it all into the positive, opposite.

I sought to bombard my mind with positive messages, multiple times a day, so that there would be no room for the negative. And when I did have negative thoughts, I worked to replace them with positive thoughts, right away. I worked as hard as I could to fight against that toxic negativity.

And I failed, miserably. Changing my thoughts was never, could never be so simple.

After I abandoned my journey toward "positive thinking," I began a new journey--the journey toward truly understanding my mind.

I learned that in my effort to only think positive thoughts, I was rejecting my own mind. Negative thoughts are an effort of the mind to communicate something, a cry for help. And I was attacking my mind for its cries, because they were "negative."

The alternative course of action is to make peace with these cries for help, and to answer them.



This is what I learned in my journey to pursue that course:
1. Negative thoughts are often based on misunderstandings. When I attacked myself with my thoughts--when I called myself fat, stupid, or a failure--I was misunderstanding myself. There was something about me that I needed to look at more closely, a misunderstanding that I needed to clear up. Now, when I think poorly about myself or someone else, I gently ask my mind "why." Why am I thinking that? In looking at the answer and clearing up the misunderstanding, I am able to stop a lot more of those thoughts than I was through "positive thinking."

2. Negative thoughts can stem from neglecting our own needs. If I'm crabby about doing something, helping somebody, or going somewhere, I've found that it's usually because I need to spend some time doing something I want. In some way, it's because I need to spend time meeting one of my needs. Martyrdom and overextension breed such "negative" thoughts, which are really just the mind's cries for help.

3. Hopelessness comes from misunderstandings and exhaustion. "It will never get better; why do I try?" is the mind's way of saying, "I don't know what to do, and I need a NAP!" Learning to relax, then think calmly about a situation has done a lot more to open up my creativity, than any positive affirmations ever did. And learning to ask for what I need, when I need it, has worked wonders toward stopping that feeling of overwhelm.

In the end, I learned that every negative thought has a purpose, and that simply trying to override them can never work in the long-term. By abandoning "positive thinking" and moving toward understanding, I have found my outlook to be sunnier and my mind to be calmer.