I have a hard time getting things done...

Marcus

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#1
I'm sure that this topic has been discused over and over again, but I have been struggling with this for a while, and I feel that I need to tell my own story, and hopefully get some specific advice.

I'm 21 years old and I recently moved in my own apartment again. I moved out the first time when I was 18 and the problem with procrastinaion went completley out of hand back then. In the end my kitchen was always full of dirty dishes, the rest of the apartment messy and all I did was go to school, and then play computer when I got home, often continuing until late at night, and being very tired the day after.

Since then, I have matured quite alot and the problem is far from as bad. But it's there and I feel it's only going in one direction. I'm trying different things, to overcome it, such as getting good sleeping habbits and eating well, but I feel like it's 1 step forward and 2 backwards. Lately I've been trying these apps for creating good habits, but I find it hard to keep doing one thing for a long time, and also it's hard to know which habits to start with, since having too many obviously doesn't work.

I want to have an apartment that is always decently clean and tidy and I need some habits in terms of doing my homework and other tasks.

Right now my apartment is not a very good enviroment for me. Everytime I come home and see dishes I know was supposed to be done or extreme mess, I feel guilty and bad about myself. I don't expect it to shine everyday, but I feel I need it at a certain standard for me to thrive there.

Sorry for the long post. I hope someone have taken their time to read through and can give me some advice.

Thanks in advance.
 

Marcus

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#3
You must make the choice to eliminate procrastination then follow through. Also, it helps to clean up and do other tasks you may dread little by little and not all at once.
I have made the choice, because I know I don't thrive as it is now. The follow through I'm still working on. I like the idea of doing things little by little though.
Thanks for the response!
 

Ricardo Ortiz

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#4
I find it easier to do things that are boring by combining it with some activity that is fun. For instance, there are times when I have to do the dishes and I listen to music with my earphones on. Or If I have to do a boring paper I play a wonderful fun movie on Netflix. The trick here is to combine it with something you like. For me this helps also doing things small steps at a time.
 
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#5
I guess we're both in same shoes @OP.
Ortiz, your suggestion works well but like he said, concentrating on an action for long is quite difficult.
One of the reasons is having too many things on mind to do.
Does anyone have a solution to de-clutter the mind and take actions one thing at a time.
 

Ry!

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#6
Have a gander at this Ted Talk. He discusses how he went from a C student to an A student by changing his working habits. I've also listened to a podcast called Cortex where CGP Grey also talks about changing the system to get better results, not just trying harder. Trying harder never works, you need better systems. Maybe your system is that you aren't allowed to play anything until you've done dishes etc. whatever. That's something that works well for small tasks like that. Something else to consider is that it gets easier over time. Currently your brain is literally wired to procrastinate, but after you start taking care of things immediately your brain will be wired to work so in the future. So after acquiring this new habit it will become part of who you are and leaving them undone will be as hard as doing them now.

 

Jeff4490A

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#7
I’ve struggled with these same things, procrastination which leads to clutter and inability to focus…


One of the things I did was to de-clutter everything literally. I threw out or gave away all of the stuff I didn’t really need. That left less stuff to clutter up right off the bat and helped clear my mind.


I find meditation a few times a day very helpful. I know some may be hesitant to try meditation but it doesn't have to be “weird” it can be as simple as taking 10 minutes a few times a day to just focus on breathing. Over time this will lower your overall stress and make it easier to focus. I’ve found after a week or so of consistently mediating for a few minutes I start to feel the benefits.


I have also had success with scheduling; I just use a Google calendar to map out my day and weeks with anchors and triggers. For example every time I finish eating dinner I know the 15 minutes immediately following that is for doing the days dishes and cleaning up a bit.


I am not sure what everybody’s resources are but one option may be to take yourself out of the equation altogether and just delegate it. Hire someone to come in once a week or twice a month and keep it cleaned up, delegate the stuff you don’t like. I hate doing and folding wash for example so I drop it off each week. Sometimes it’s not that we are lazy or procrastinators but that we’re not excited about what we have to do, so if possible put someone on it and you may find it easier to get motivated and focused on the stuff that you like doing.
 

ang.necole11

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#8
Allow yourself to do one task a day as opposed to overwhelming yourself. Maybe monday you clean the bath and tuesday you clean the floors and etc. From there, you can set yourself a schedule to follow. Also, before you leave a room give it a quick tidy up before you leave. That way you don't allow the mess to pile up.
 

joy

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#9
I'm sure that this topic has been discused over and over again, but I have been struggling with this for a while, and I feel that I need to tell my own story, and hopefully get some specific advice.

I'm 21 years old and I recently moved in my own apartment again. I moved out the first time when I was 18 and the problem with procrastinaion went completley out of hand back then. In the end my kitchen was always full of dirty dishes, the rest of the apartment messy and all I did was go to school, and then play computer when I got home, often continuing until late at night, and being very tired the day after.

Since then, I have matured quite alot and the problem is far from as bad. But it's there and I feel it's only going in one direction. I'm trying different things, to overcome it, such as getting good sleeping habbits and eating well, but I feel like it's 1 step forward and 2 backwards. Lately I've been trying these apps for creating good habits, but I find it hard to keep doing one thing for a long time, and also it's hard to know which habits to start with, since having too many obviously doesn't work.

I want to have an apartment that is always decently clean and tidy and I need some habits in terms of doing my homework and other tasks.

Right now my apartment is not a very good enviroment for me. Everytime I come home and see dishes I know was supposed to be done or extreme mess, I feel guilty and bad about myself. I don't expect it to shine everyday, but I feel I need it at a certain standard for me to thrive there.

Sorry for the long post. I hope someone have taken their time to read through and can give me some advice.

Thanks in advance.
I'm sure that this topic has been discused over and over again, but I have been struggling with this for a while, and I feel that I need to tell my own story, and hopefully get some specific advice.

I'm 21 years old and I recently moved in my own apartment again. I moved out the first time when I was 18 and the problem with procrastinaion went completley out of hand back then. In the end my kitchen was always full of dirty dishes, the rest of the apartment messy and all I did was go to school, and then play computer when I got home, often continuing until late at night, and being very tired the day after.

Since then, I have matured quite alot and the problem is far from as bad. But it's there and I feel it's only going in one direction. I'm trying different things, to overcome it, such as getting good sleeping habbits and eating well, but I feel like it's 1 step forward and 2 backwards. Lately I've been trying these apps for creating good habits, but I find it hard to keep doing one thing for a long time, and also it's hard to know which habits to start with, since having too many obviously doesn't work.

I want to have an apartment that is always decently clean and tidy and I need some habits in terms of doing my homework and other tasks.

Right now my apartment is not a very good enviroment for me. Everytime I come home and see dishes I know was supposed to be done or extreme mess, I feel guilty and bad about myself. I don't expect it to shine everyday, but I feel I need it at a certain standard for me to thrive there.

Sorry for the long post. I hope someone have taken their time to read through and can give me some advice.

Thanks in advance.
i had that problem or should i say i am also fighting the problem of procrastination, but i have learnt to do one thing at a time thats how i have been able to fight it.
 
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#10
Being in a situation where one is overwhelmed and feel lost is not uncommon. Being self aware and recognising it is the first step of the solution. This 2 mins video have some great insights to make your brain focus and hopefully you will be able to get things done.
 
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#11
Trying harder never works, you need better systems
This is gold. Because at one moment you will be full of motivation and other times you will have 0. For me it works the best if I just say to my self "I will just clean for 5 minutes." That way you lower the bar to such a low level that you will automatically do more once you start. It is also a good idea for cleaning up and such to pick a time like after dinner and every day do just 5 min of cleaning. Music or Audio-books always help.
Good luck!
 

Sarah Carlson

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#12
Hi Marcus, same age as me 21 :)

I think you will find this video helpful
HACK YOUR MIND - Jim Kwik on Procrastination and Habits

 
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#13
Marcus!

Thanks for sharing and reaching out for some help buddy!

I have Adult ADHD, so if there's anyone who understands the concept of procrastination and putting things off until later, it's me LOL!

Writing things down is an imperative step in getting things done. Google the names Brian Tracy and Jim Rohn if you've never heard of them. Reading some tokens of wisdom online from these guys can have a GREAT impact on how you think!

Tony Robbins also talks about raise your standards.

A lot of people nowadays have Netflix and video gaming as their standard for when they return home from school or work or both. DWELLING on nothing but entertainment is why our energy and focus typically and naturally directs toward mindless entertainment because we want to mentally escape the dreadful chores around the house and the mundane, lackluster homework we were assigned for a class we may or may not give a darn about.

Give yourself a REWARD system. When you sit down to play on your computer, make sure you've addressed tasks in your apartment so you EARN the right to sit down and enjoy yourself.

Regarding dishes piling up, dude.. turn on some upbeat music and drown out your inner voice that keeps telling you to ignore it ;)

Trust me dude, I too have a very, very strong weakness for gaming on my Xbox One, but there also comes a point when we've got to man up (I know a lot of people hate that phrase, but there's a reason why it became a well-known phrase) and handle our responsibilities.

Also, it becomes increasingly difficult to attract a lady (or a guy if you go that way) if we show little signs of well-developed character and caring about ourselves and our lives and living environment.
 
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#14
Hi @Marcus I agree with building systems and delegating work (if you have the resources). I want to ask why do you feel guilty when you come home and look at the dirty dishes that you haven't washed yet?

I think feeling guilty is a problem in itself. It often takes away our power or control over the situation. If you can avoid feeling guilty, I think you will have an easier time doing the dishes and getting things done.

Cheers!
 
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#15
I'm sure that this topic has been discused over and over again, but I have been struggling with this for a while, and I feel that I need to tell my own story, and hopefully get some specific advice.

I'm 21 years old and I recently moved in my own apartment again. I moved out the first time when I was 18 and the problem with procrastinaion went completley out of hand back then. In the end my kitchen was always full of dirty dishes, the rest of the apartment messy and all I did was go to school, and then play computer when I got home, often continuing until late at night, and being very tired the day after.

Since then, I have matured quite alot and the problem is far from as bad. But it's there and I feel it's only going in one direction. I'm trying different things, to overcome it, such as getting good sleeping habbits and eating well, but I feel like it's 1 step forward and 2 backwards. Lately I've been trying these apps for creating good habits, but I find it hard to keep doing one thing for a long time, and also it's hard to know which habits to start with, since having too many obviously doesn't work.

I want to have an apartment that is always decently clean and tidy and I need some habits in terms of doing my homework and other tasks.

Right now my apartment is not a very good enviroment for me. Everytime I come home and see dishes I know was supposed to be done or extreme mess, I feel guilty and bad about myself. I don't expect it to shine everyday, but I feel I need it at a certain standard for me to thrive there.

Sorry for the long post. I hope someone have taken their time to read through and can give me some advice.

Thanks in advance.
Hey Markus, a lots of people dealing with this problem. Actually, no-one could ever get rid of procrastination. We are people, and people genetically wants and seek comfort. So don´t worry, you aren´t alone.
From your experience, I think your problem is, that you try to get rid of procrastination too fast. You can´t change your bad habits from one day to another. It´s like you were all your life right-handed, and you suddenly decide, from tomorrow I will write, eat, and do everything with my left hand. Would it works? I don´t think so.
The only way you can rid of bad habit, is step by step. So you have problem with let´s say, doing homework, because of playing computer. Try something like set a timer, play one game, and after that, get 15 minutes break and do your homework. Do it several times, and your homework will be done, you play games.
For another day, try to work on your homework not 15. but 20 minutes (see? baby steps), and continue with this and suddenly, you will not have that problem.
Point is, in anything you want to change you have to start slowly, because if you want to stop bad habit immediately, you ´ll feel overwhelmed and so discomfort (because of big drastical change), that you decide to stop trying. Try to look at this my post here, it should helps you understand, Why people procrastinate, which is important for understanding your triggers (https://www.personal-development.com/community/threads/why-we-all-procrastinate.4994/).
Hope it was helpful, Good luck with your change.
Also my Free Report below covers that topic, so feel free to check it.