How to make a relationship work!

Isantis Tao

Coaching Member
Joined
Feb 13, 2013
Messages
98
Points
65
It is no secret that the divorce rate these days is over 50% and couples everywhere are having trouble making relationships work. People are constantly complaining about not having the relationships they want and their relationships not working out...but why is that?

There are plenty of issues with relationships, but there are some basic principles about why they work and why they do not. In this video I discuss these basic principles you should abide by to make your relationship work. Please watch the video, and then lets open up a discussion on the various specific relationship issues that come into play and how to make your relationship work.

 

CraZzyChiC

Senior Member
Joined
Sep 15, 2014
Messages
102
Points
107
Yes being two independent people while being interdependent is important! Thank you for contributing to the discussion! :)
I personally don't believe that is true, for one simple reason you can not be two separate people and be in a relationship at the same time. That is probably why most relationships find that they don't match anymore because they are being more away from each other then being as one.
  • 1+1=2 but in a relationship terms 1+1=US, See there is NO I in US.
Well that is my interpretation of the thing. I hope that it helped :)
 

Isantis Tao

Coaching Member
Joined
Feb 13, 2013
Messages
98
Points
65
I disagree I think its unhealthy to loose 100% of your independance in a relationship. You still need to be your own person and have some time to yourself. But I do agree that relationships are about "Us" and that you do need to merge with your partner for the most part.
 

siltonmart

New Member
Joined
Sep 21, 2014
Messages
3
Points
1
While compared to the olden days , The bond of relationship is somewhat becoming weak and the reason for this kind of problems is differ. Counseling, whether individual, couples, or group, focuses on resources, solutions and strategies to deal with your presenting problem. In order for counseling to be effective, it is necessary for you to take an active role.
Life counseling services
 

namktqs

Coaching Member
Joined
Jul 31, 2014
Messages
129
Points
75
People need grateful good things they have in their relationship. Always remind this and trust who you are, who you can.
 

Anthony Docherty

Advisor Member
Joined
Sep 28, 2014
Messages
11
Points
40
Location
UK
I think you should never try to change your partner - ever! There is no hard and fast rule to relationships, they take work. I think a successful and happy relationship is one full of love, understanding, acceptance, compromise and forgiveness.
 

Aree Wongwanlee

Advisor Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2014
Messages
73
Points
25
Location
Thailand
I think many relationships are already doomed from day one. Reason being that the relationship was not built on anything that would lead to a long-term situation. For example, some people get into a relationship just because it is fashionable to be in a relationship. All their friends are in a relationship and they don't want to be the odd man out. So they get into a relationship. And get out of the relationship when it's no longer fashionable to be in a relationship.
 

tomasoberg

Senior Member
Joined
Oct 20, 2014
Messages
208
Points
192
Location
Sweden
I think one big reason is why they fail is because the individual stop developing her/hes dreams, they give up everything they had before and just go after him/her instead.
They stop living.
Especially for guys this is a big factor, just because you meet a wonderful girl . DONT stop living your life, dont stop training, dont stop walking your path to your dreams, keep going because remember thats what she got attracted to in the first place.
The FREEMAN, not the Wuuzz .

One big factor is communication as well, just keep it open.

Learn to appreciate the small things and each other as well, to much negative bullshit is tearing the relationships a part.

Its all about a healthy balance between the two parts of being with yourself and have your own life and have a life together.

Im certain if you spend to much time with each other you will get tired of looking at each other.
If you spend to much time from each other the emotions will fade after a while.

So its a perfect balance between them, as it is with the "energy as well" masculine and feminine.
Keep pushing towards your own dreams and goals and put up goals and dreams together as well :)
 

BuildALife

New Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
8
Points
3
Allowing people to be who they are instead of trying to make them what you want to be. Allowing your mate to grow and expand. Practice allowing. www.faithdreamlove.com[/QUOTE]

Couldn't agree more, but also add that they must allow you the same in return.

The other comments relating to ensuring you keep your own dreams alive I think add greatly to the discussion as well. Not only can your life become boring but you can also become boring to your partner if you don't keep active and happy.

The divorce rate is high in the modern era for a few basic reasons in my mind:
1. People can survive easier on their own. Modern women have far greater capacity to thrive and survive, allowing them more freedom of choice in a relationship
2. Less stigma attached to divorce than in the past
3. More focus on self and less on marriage and family

I'm not convinced that modern people marry for bad reasons anymore than people did in the past, if you look back over most peoples family trees they are filled with people in unhappy marriages that should never have married in the first place. The difference is that today people are far less likely to stay in an unhappy/unhealthy relationship.
 

Aree Wongwanlee

Advisor Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2014
Messages
73
Points
25
Location
Thailand
For a relationship to work, there must be something for the people in the relationship to be working towards. Together. If they are working towards something but not together in their endeavour, then it's just a matter of time before they break apart. Doing different things in life which are totally not connected to and absolutely does not involve your partner is a sure recipe for failure.
 

Todd Hicks

Senior Advisor
Joined
Dec 3, 2014
Messages
503
Points
217
Location
St. Louis, Missouri
The number of 50 % for the divorce rate is not as bad as it may seem. A long time ago, a co-worker told me that half of all marriages do not end up in divorce - rather, some people get divorced at least two or three times.