Handle Criticism

MoreSuccess

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How well do you handle criticism? Let's say you complete a project you're proud of or achieve something you've been working hard on, and then tell a friend or family member about it, and they just tell you ways you could improve it, without any positive feedback. Does that annoy you, or are you able to maintain an attitude that you don't care what they think?

I try to maintain that indifferent attitude to avoid feeling bad, although it can be hard. I think some people think they are genuinely being helpful and giving you "constructive criticism" or advice, and may be uncomfortable or unwilling to offer praise. Personally I always try to give praise, even if it's to be followed with advice, everyone needs that motivation, and you can usually always find something good about what they did.

Any tips for handling this situation, when someone just criticizes or offers advice when all you wanted to do was share something you were proud of?
 

Thorium

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Great question you raised there, my friend.

To be honest, I don't handle criticism too well. Maybe that's just a weakness of me.. I'm not sure. But generally, I don't think most people handle criticism well - what they want is appreciation for their work. I always welcome constructive criticism. For example, if I write an article and someone gives a small suggestion that I should consider in my future writings, I'll welcome and appreciate the 'constructive criticism' very well - because clearly what the other person wanted was to help me get better at what I do.

However, a dry criticism with no sense of appreciation at all is an INSTANT way to get my mood off and get me discouraged. When someone means to show appreciation, you just know it. But when someone is being stern with their criticism, it never feels good. That is one reason I try my best to be as supportive and appreciative as I can be with people. Anyhow, as for handling criticism.. my answer would be I suck at it! I think I'm still inexperienced when it comes to handling it well.
 

speedy

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As we know that there are 2 types of criticism ; the constructive and destructive criticism. It is really painful if somebody criticized your work and left a comment like "you are no good". I get easily depressed especially if I know that I did all my best yet still not good. In handling criticism it depends of what kind of criticism I received. If it is a constructive criticism and giving me and idea, suggestion on how to develop a particular thing, I will be grateful to that person. But if it is a destructive criticism,especially criticizing my work behind my back without telling me anything, I will ignore it. Of course, at first I want to fire back but then I realized that its not worth it. Maybe, that person was just envious with my work and so he/she criticized from the back. But still I will consider some issue and recheck my work to make sure its alright. :)
 

beingwell

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Yes, I would be annoyed given a situation like that. But, I wouldn't want that to ruin what I think of my project. I'll take their criticisms and put it into good use. I'm sure my families and friends meant well when and if they tell me that my project or job can be improved in some areas.
 

radascars

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I remember when I was in college where I already finish my model of an environment and then suddenly a group of people came to another section saw my model and then there's this guy who comment badly, he even insulted me for making it. I accept constructive criticism but I really got pissed that time.

It really depends on how they criticize my work, I also do criticize other works as I am a critique my self and its really frustrating but criticism do make you good in the future.
 

tired

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I'm sure there was a way he could have made some "suggestions" while also commenting on the originality or uniqueness of your idea - something that basically said keep up the good work. Maybe he was jealous or just a nasty person. Unfortunately, they do exist in this world. Don't take it personally.
 

radascars

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I'm sure there was a way he could have made some "suggestions" while also commenting on the originality or uniqueness of your idea - something that basically said keep up the good work. Maybe he was jealous or just a nasty person. Unfortunately, they do exist in this world. Don't take it personally.
Nahh, they've done that on purpose and their model won the prize and I am just a placer. I really love competing a lot when it comes to my forte. I learned from them and in the future they will learn their mistakes too. :)
 

Cecil Estrera

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For me, it depends on how criticism is being given to my work. If it's well said then fine, I'll thank my critic for it. But if it's already insulting, then I would really feel bad about it.
 

radascars

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For me, it depends on how criticism is being given to my work. If it's well said then fine, I'll thank my critic for it. But if it's already insulting, then I would really feel bad about it.
I advise you to appreciate more the insults instead of thanking those compliments. Why? You can't be much better if you always here compliments here and there unlike with insults, it may open up your mind to do your work more better to strive better.

People tend to improved more when they experienced criticism.
 

coachSychie

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In many cases, one becomes
emotionally blocked, reacting automatically, by becoming struck
dumb and looking guilty, or by immediately counterattacking
and thereby creating a conflict.

Do you recognize yourself in any of this? Or is it even so that you find it hard to be
exposed to criticism all together, even when it is OK? Or i may be different with
different persons - with some it is OK, with others it always goes wrong.

Be as it may with this, you would benefit from always being able to meet with criticism
in a good way, where you yourself can keep calm, and where you have a calming
influence on the situation.

The first step for you in developing such an ability, is to make yourself aware of your
subconscious, automatic, reaction pattern which sometimes is the result of being
exposed to criticism. This reaction pattern is often characterized by being an emotional
blocking - before you have been able to think clearly, a strong emotion erupts: you
feel offended, or intimidated, or shamed, or angry, or you feel a paralyzing sorrow...

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