Did you always want kids?

Jessi

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Were you the type that always knew you would have kids at some point?

Or did you not want kids at all and decided to have them later on?

If you were the latter, do you wish you hadn't had kids after all?

I know, lots of questions, but I was having this conversation with a friend whose boyfriend really wants kids and she doesn't at all. They're still young and have time to decide, but she's starting to hope that if she does decide to have one, all the mommy hormones will kick in and she'll automatically love them, care for them, etc.
 

amy005

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I have 2 nieces and one nephew who are 2,3, and 5. I pretty much fell in love with them all immediately after meeting them and knew right away that I wanted to have kids of my own. Now that I have my own the love I have for him is just amazing and like no other love. I think that no matter what after carrying a child for 9 months and giving birth to them she will naturally feel like a mother but she need to remember it does take patience and it is stressful so she needs to be prepared.
 

clauemi

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I thought I did not want kids when I was a teenager and before I got married but it was because I was afraid of the whole labor part and thought I was going to have a horrible pregnancy like my mom did. Both of my pregnancies were wonderful compared to other moms horror stories lol. But once I got married and matured a little more I felt a desire to have a family and some purpose.
 

Jessi

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I think that no matter what after carrying a child for 9 months and giving birth to them she will naturally feel like a mother but she need to remember it does take patience and it is stressful so she needs to be prepared.
I think that's the part that scares her most. She's read horror stories of postpartum depression and mothers killing their children, etc. She knows many of them wanted kids, and thinks that maybe something worse would happen to her because she didn't really even want them in the first place.
 

AmazingP

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I think it is just natural for some young people to never think yet of having children of their own because they could be wanting more of the lifestyle that they are enjoying. However, as the years would go by, I am sure a great majority of them would be changing their orientation.

Personally, I always loved to have kids of my own and it was part of my dreams then. Children will always be my joy and the biggest symbol of my fulfillment in life.

I am a proud parent of my children! :D
 

ayedsena

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I didn't really want kids and I was never interested in kids when I was younger. I was not the babysitting type and didn't play with baby dolls much. When I was 23, I got pregnant unexpectedly and I believe that my son (who is now 12) has made me who I am today. I didn't always know how to do it right and I grew up with him. We have a great relationship. I now am 35 and happily married and have a 2 year old. My husband adopted my first son and I am glad I have the family that I do.
 

jasserdev

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I have never wanted kids since I was young and I met my wife while seeking someone who didn't want children either. We have been married 12 years but she has changed her mind and now wants a child. I think that she was actually repressing her maternal instincts for quite some time whereas I am quite happy to use my time for other activities including charitable work so this will be quite a change for me and I am trying to be positive for her despite my own reservations and concerns about the loss of free time that will occur.
 
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It's funny, as a dude I never really longed or pictured having kids. I always imagined being a successful business man or a performer. But like many of our wishes it changes over time. Once I did achieve my success I started to feel empty. I had my wonderful wife but something was missing. I soon realized it was the joy (and pain. lol) of parenthood. Once my daughter was born I realized that my life was now complete.

But it took a while to figure that out. So I think it all depends on where you are in your life. And your life will ultimately tell you this. You just have to be open to it. Now we're trying for a second and it's different this time around for me. I'll be happy if we are blessed with one. But I don't have the same longing I did before my daughter was born. It's so weird how these feelings jump around.
 

Daisiesndots

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I have always known that I wanted to have kids. When I was in high school I had a hard time deciding on a career because all that really mattered to me was having kids, the only thing I was sure about in my life was that I wanted to have children. I still wanted to get a good degree but the only passion I had found was my passion for one day being a mom.
 
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I knew I wanted kids from the time I was a kid myself. I babysit quite a bit as a teenager and continued to know I wanted kids. I could not imagine not having kids but realize that having children is not for everyone.
 

IsabelleChan

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Well, I've never wanted to have kids. Maybe because I'm young and have too many goals to work on. Maybe because I'm never a maternal person. Maybe because I've also never wanted marriage. Unlike ordinary girls, I don't want to end up being housewives and having children. I'm more inclined to work on my bigger goals and enjoy an unlimited supply of freedom. Of course, I respect my mom and the painstaking efforts that she has put into raising me, it's just I'm never into parenting and all that stuff. Weird, isn't it? I have always thought that girls nowadays feel the same way as I do but it turns out that I am completely wrong. :rolleyes:
 
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I always wanted and that's the dream of everyone to have a chance to see there own generation. Kids will make your family complete, will make you happy and let you experience the life of being who you are.
 

MysteriousMommy

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Were you the type that always knew you would have kids at some point?

Or did you not want kids at all and decided to have them later on?

If you were the latter, do you wish you hadn't had kids after all?

I know, lots of questions, but I was having this conversation with a friend whose boyfriend really wants kids and she doesn't at all. They're still young and have time to decide, but she's starting to hope that if she does decide to have one, all the mommy hormones will kick in and she'll automatically love them, care for them, etc.
I absolutely did NOT want kids until right about the time I turned 30. As a matter of fact, I still don't like kids. I love my children deeply, but for the most part, other people's kids get on my last nerve. I had a lot of growing up to do in my twenties and had not yet found the right partner to have children with. However, soon after I met my husband I just knew that it was time for me to become a mother. I knew he would be a wonderful father, and my mind started to open up to the possibility of being a parent.

I am so glad I decided to have children. They are only 16 weeks old, but I have experienced more love and joy in these last 16 weeks than I have in my entire life.

However, when people ask me about my change of heart I just tell them that it's different for everyone. I personally changed my mind and knew that I had come to the point in my life that I was ready for something more, but not everyone will experience that kind of transformation. Being a parent isn't for everyone, and that is perfectly OK, but in the end for me it was!
 

bneil

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I always want kids too, they are a blessing from above, they sometimes give joys to parents, I am hoping I could have a lot of children soon.
 

Dorothy

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Yes I have always wanted kids. I used to always tell my mom that I was going to have 10 kids when I grew up, well I had 11 kids! I love being a mother and although it isn't always easy I would not change anything, my kids and now 26 soon to be 27 grandkids are my world. I love them so much!!
 

daisyhongjuly

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I did not want kids for many years & neither did my husband. We have been together a long time, and then accidentally got pregnant and went through with it. Most of my friends do not have kids, but now I can't imagine life without them. But it is funny that there are so many people out there who always knew they wanted kids. We had a second kid because I could not imagine raising an only child, and I am glad because they entertain each other and me!
 

Dorothy

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I have always wanted to have kids and a lot of them. I always told my mom and dad that when I grew up I wanted live in the country and have ten kids and a farm. Well I got one out of three, I have 11 kids and now 27 soon to be 28 grandkids! I love it.
 

digitalbrew

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I used to like having kids... I even planned to have kids at an early age (early 20s) so that I could enjoy being with them when they grew up but after a couple of years, that yearning just died out. Maybe because I am selfish... or maybe because I know that I am unstable yet.

Since I have been taking care of my nieces that, I have gone through part of the mommy process without being the mommy. Having to wake up in the middle of the night to change their diapers, teaching them in their assignments and activities, disciplining, saving money for outings, prioritizing their needs before mine and having to deal with a lot more has just been part of my life for more than a decade.

I may regret not having kids someday but fortunately for me, I still have some time to think about it.
 

Dorothy

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I used to like having kids... I even planned to have kids at an early age (early 20s) so that I could enjoy being with them when they grew up but after a couple of years, that yearning just died out. Maybe because I am selfish... or maybe because I know that I am unstable yet.

Since I have been taking care of my nieces that, I have gone through part of the mommy process without being the mommy. Having to wake up in the middle of the night to change their diapers, teaching them in their assignments and activities, disciplining, saving money for outings, prioritizing their needs before mine and having to deal with a lot more has just been part of my life for more than a decade.

I may regret not having kids someday but fortunately for me, I still have some time to think about it.

I have a friend of mine that is now in her late 50's that never had children, and at first she was like me wanting to have kids and all, but then over time, she just wasn't sure. She was always the favorite aunt, and would spend time with all the nieces and nephews and then went about her business and she told me one day that with the chance of sounding selfish that she actually liked that way and so she never had kids, and she had no regrets. I guess everybody has their own way of being happy and living their life and I don't think that it is selfiish to not have kids, I think everyone should be able to choose how they will live their lives. Besides, what would the kids do without the favorite aunt that can be the cool relative.:)
 

marlinealcott

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Definitely not. I went from saying a definite no when I was younger, to now (at 30) still leaning heavily toward no. It would be nice in some ways, but I don't really like kids and in general, I find having other people around all the time to be emotionally exhausting. I can't imagine having a person who relied on me for EVERYTHING. It just sounds like a nightmare to me. I don't even have a dog because I can't stand the neediness.

I love myself and my life and want it all, 100% for ME. :)