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  1. dennmart

    Sharpen Your Focus Using the Pomodoro Technique

    I've been doing this technique for years and it works wonderfully. Currently I do a 50/10 split (50 minutes of work, 10 minute break) since it works better for my type of work, so I encourage people to experiment with timing. A common mistake I see is people forcing themselves to strictly do 25...
  2. dennmart

    Habit building is an important skill, Tell me some success stories!

    The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg is my go-to book whenever someone asks me about habit change. If you haven't read that book, I highly suggest you begin reading it before publishing your blog post! I've taken the book's main message of the book and applied it successfully to many different...
  3. dennmart

    I just traveled for work on the wrong week. I am always so distracted, how to improve?

    Based on what you wrote, I'm guessing that you either have far too many things to do or too many problems (either real or imagined) on your mind, which is causing your mind to wander. Does this sound like you? I mention it because it sounds exactly like I was during a pretty hectic period of my...
  4. dennmart

    Has anyone paid $1000-$2000 (or more) for an online course?

    Thank you so much for that reply, Sarah! You bring up a lot of great points about investing this amount of money, especially regarding the opportunities that these courses provide to connect you with others who are farther along the path than I am. That's something that I miss a lot, especially...
  5. dennmart

    Does anyone else love learning new things in their leisure time?

    I love learning new things all the time. Whether it be related to my career as a software engineer, learning Japanese since it's a necessity while living in Japan, or just diving into topics that I find interesting, I'm always looking for something new to spend my free time on. Lately, though...
  6. dennmart

    Sleep Hypnosis - too good to be true?

    I spend ten minutes meditating every night. Often they're unguided meditations, but sometimes I use a tool like Insight Timer and get a guided meditation to help me fall asleep. It sounds like it's something similar and has the same purpose of clearing your mind and putting your body in an ideal...
  7. dennmart

    Kindly ask for advice after break up

    I'm sorry to hear that it's still tough. I really wish there was a secret to getting over this and feeling better immediately, but sadly there isn't. Like I mentioned in my comment (and Derek as well), it takes months to get through a situation like this. But it will pass, guaranteed. One thing...
  8. dennmart

    My Self-Improvement Journey

    First off, it's awesome that you're not only trying to actively improve your life but also being able to recognize that you needed to work a different way to reach what you want to accomplish. Not a lot of people do that - they just spin their wheels in place and wonder why they haven't improved...
  9. dennmart

    Has anyone paid $1000-$2000 (or more) for an online course?

    Elhama, thank you for your very thoughtful reply. Thanks for sharing that resource for online courses. I had never heard of them before, but they seem to have a lot of content so I'll be looking into them. I usually try to avoid free or low-priced courses because the quality of the content...
  10. dennmart

    How to stop desiring women. I'm committed to self-betterment

    I also second what whitelotus mentioned above as far as medication goes. I had a friend who had a similar problem, although his issue seemed to dive more into sex addiction than what you're describing here. Regardless, based on what he told me, what helped him was seeing a professionally...
  11. dennmart

    Has anyone paid $1000-$2000 (or more) for an online course?

    There are a few online courses that I've been really interested in by a few prominent influencers in my areas of expertise/interest. These courses have amazing reviews and success stories by former students, and there's a high probability that I'll get more than my return on investment after...
  12. dennmart

    Contacting each other outside of dating site...

    Well, I guess I got the scam part right :) I hope someone still finds the advice given here useful!
  13. dennmart

    Contacting each other outside of dating site...

    I don't have a lot of experience on dating sites (the last one I tried was in 2010 or 2011) but I think the principles still apply to online and offline dating all the same. I highly doubt that someone would disappear simply because you asked to chat on Skype. If she weren't interested in video...
  14. dennmart

    Health vs Looking good

    I've never heard of being in the 16-18% body fat range for optimal long-term health. Can you share where you got that from? I'm curious about it. I think the main thing you should focus on is how you feel - both physically and mentally. Do you feel great under your current diet and weight? If...
  15. dennmart

    Kindly ask for advice after break up

    When I was in my 20s, I was in a relationship for over four years when my then-girlfriend decided to suddenly break up with me after one argument. We rarely argued about anything and when we did we would usually find a compromise quickly, so I was taken aback by the sudden break-up. I discovered...
  16. dennmart

    The girl I'm interested in can't speak English... I need HELP!!

    This is pretty much spot on. Always trust your instincts. Have you looked into what it would take to learn some basic Thai since that seems to be the hold-up here with you? It might sound like an overwhelming task, but in life, if there's something that you truly want to pursue, you'll find...
  17. dennmart

    I want kids but my girlfriend doesn't want them... what should I do?

    I think you both need to have a more serious conversation with each other about it. You mention that she showed disinterest in kids and made a couple of comments about it, but it doesn't sound like you're certain she meant what she did or not since you brought up the topic in an off-hand type of...
  18. dennmart

    What are you all guys do when someone interrupt your leisure time?

    In the past, if someone interrupted me, I would get incredibly irritated. I wouldn't lash out or anything like that, but it would definitely upset me visibly. I eventually realized that people don't interrupt me intentionally and more often than not whatever I was doing wasn't that important...
  19. dennmart

    How to form new habits, making my life more organised?

    Let's just focus first on getting to sleep earlier, which sounds like a good habit to build first to make it easier to take on other habits you want to form. I also went through a period of poor sleep and have been able to fix most of my issues (I'd still love to wake up earlier, though!). The...
  20. dennmart

    Learning From a "Classic"

    I think it's a bit rare that old books age well enough to be as useful as How to Win Friends and Influence People is nowadays, but there certainly is plenty of material that is pretty much timeless. I've been reading up a little bit about Stoicism in recent months, and it always blows me away...