Punishments / consequences

Jay G

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Jul 15, 2017
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#1
Hi all,

As a parent of 2 young children (both under 10) I've recently been reading a few books on parenting and was pleased to see some common threads across them all. Specifically, the importance of: Praise, Listening, encouraging Self-Reliance, and Special Time.

There was a bit more confusion though on the subject of Punishment! With some books ruling it out, whilst others advocating it albeit characterizing as 'Consequences' (rather than punishments) or 'time-out' style actions. On balance though, most seemed to be against Punishing misbehavior, characterizing punishments as negative and ultimately counter-productive.

I was somewhat surprised by this and would love to hear others views. To punish or not, and if not how to react to misbehavior!
 

Angie Necole

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May 11, 2017
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#2
discipline versus punishments. Punishment may involve yelling and spanking which can be traumatic to a child. Discipline, however, teaches kids what is wrong and is most effective when you use (natural) consequences. Your teenager refuses to wear a coat outside on a winter day? Natural consequence: they will get cold and come inside for their coat. They'll know better next time.

It's important to use both discipline and praise so that children know the correct way to act or behave.
 
Joined
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#3
You know it's sad to see how punishments were in the old days. And the simple mentality of hey my dad did it and it was worse! It almost seems like there trying to feel as if there trying to fulfil that pain and make there kids feel there's. At 25 my parents weren't bad, but yelling wasn't helpful as it made me more sensitive at being yelled at. I would have loved if I were praised or punished in more useful ways, where I learn. I might have been more confident through school and in general. I deffently know how to approach it with my kids.