Boosting self-confidence

Discussion in 'General Self Improvement' started by Cecil Estrera, Aug 20, 2011. Replies: 53 | Views: 9721

  1. Cecil Estrera

    Cecil Estrera Member

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    Growing up, I must admit I had low self-esteem. Maybe it was my peers who made me feel that I don't belong and I was a loser or something. What I did was just focus on my studies which made me look a loser even more.

    When I reached high school, I began to socialize and get a group of friends. Somehow, they have increased by confidence by telling me praises and the good qualities that I possess.

    At present, I cannot say that I have 100% confidence but I think I am confident enough to face the world.

    Now I just want to ask you guys if you have confidence-boosting tips so that anyone here who lacks confidence would learn how to change for the better.

    Well, what can you advice?
     
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  2. zararina

    zararina Coaching Member

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    It is very important to believe in your own abilities and develop it to be better. Also to put in mind that you have nothing to be ashamed of yourself unless you are doing bad things and you are hurting others. Being a positive thinker could also help boost self confidence since you will have a thinking that everything could be done, just put your best on it. And learn to accept yourself and improve what you have such as skills and talents.
     
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  3. marcustaylor

    marcustaylor New Member

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    Developing a strong sense of self is fundamental for building confidence - do something well and believe you're doing it well and that you are benefiting others. When you do this, even the slightest niggles from other people do not phase you as you know that what you are doing is genuinely good.

    Maybe join an activity group or club around your interests or hobbies - being around like-minded people also helps enormously.
     
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  4. Henry Mukuti

    Henry Mukuti New Member

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    Surely no body can hold you down except your yourself. You just need to continue building on you current self esteem. With time you will realise that you have more confidence than the average people. Read motivational materials and look at your self with pride. You have come a long way and should keep up the spirit.
     
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  5. AmazingP

    AmazingP Advisor Member

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    I actually this same problem which started way back when I was in my elementary days. and that was a long time ago. Until now, I have not yet completely shaken off this lack of confidence and fear in dealing with an audience. In fact, I have already accepted that my personality can just be deficient and though it needs a boost I know that might be hard to get by. Thanks to the online world, I am finding a way to release my thoughts and ideas which of kinda build-up my confidence gradually.
     
  6. amy005

    amy005 Member

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    For me I have learned to embrace what used to be my flaws or things that made me different and think of them as positives. I think as we grow older we realize it is better to be ourselves and make something of ourselves and not just go with the crowd and never get anywhere in life. Someone can be the coolest person in the world but really what else do they have going for themselves?
     
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  7. Cecil Estrera

    Cecil Estrera Member

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    I am more like you when I was young AmazingP. I think it also because of the separation of my parents when I was 8 years old. I remember I had such low self-esteem then. When I became a teenager, I won't even go close to boys.

    Good thing I have my husband now to boost up my self-confidence. He always tells me that I can do everything if I would just give all the best that I can. He also reminds me hat I have good personal qualities and I must say that all of those are effective in making me confident.
     
  8. Memphian Michael

    Memphian Michael New Member

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    In this dog-eat-dog world, boasting and maintaining self-confidence is crucial. Otherwise, you'll get stampeded (in the figurative, possibly even literal, way).

    • Walk with your head held high and even with a bit of swagger in your step.
    • Look everyone you come across in the eye; try to always sport a slight, confident smile.
    • Practice augmenting your interpersonal skills with family, friends, acquaintances and even relative strangers; speak freely and don't hold back (of course, refrain from disparaging, offensive, etc. kinds of rhetoric), gain rapport among like-minded people; establish a small-yet-tight circle of friends who complement your personality (and vice-versa).
    • Be an optimist! Try to turn even negative situations into positive ones; look for every opportunity in every difficulty. You'll find it.
    • Realize that inside of you---inside of everyone, actually---is a dormant but very powerful giant, just waiting to be awoken.
    Just remember: There's a big difference (although sometimes hard to distinguish) in being totally self-confident and being downright arrogant and boastful. Showcase your self-confidence, your vibrant energy and zest for yourself and others---while simultaneously giving everyone around you the same respect that you'd expect.
     
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  9. Danny Oberron

    Danny Oberron New Member

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    For me self-confidence and self-esteem are the same thing. Self-esteem is result of my actions, how I feel about what I have done, and my ability to be brave enough to solve my personal problems. Putting my esteem in the hands of an outside force is like building a house of cards, the slightest breeze will knock down my confidence. Nobody can take self-esteem from you, only you can give it away.

    What things have you done recently that YOU are proud of? Don't wait for others to tell you that you have done well, that's other-esteem. They can give it AND take it away. My parents split when I was young and I spent the next 2 decades trying to please them, one didn't care and the other was too busy gaining their own outside approvals to notice. I separated emotionally from them and became friends. I then found it far easier to build my self-esteem.
     
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  10. DailyInspiration

    DailyInspiration Member

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    Ultimately, the object is to figure out what you want and then pounce on it. In order to get there, you've got to experience smaller successes along the way. Decide that you will create something that is reasonable in its level of difficulty, and then go out and do it--no matter what it takes. As you become more confident, go tackle bigger things. All this stuff doesn't magically fall into your lap--you've got to fight for it! But don't think "fight" is a bad, negative or destructive thing. I mean, struggle for it, stumble for it, look silly for it, don't worry-- just go for your aim. This is the secret key to happiness. :)
     
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  11. johnwillson953

    johnwillson953 New Member

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    Becoming Successful by Building self esteem and Building confidence. Learn to build inner strengths that are necessary to accomplishing success.

    High Self Esteem
     
  12. bneil

    bneil Member

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    Try this, practice talking to a lot of strangers you can come, and talk just like you are long time friends, in this way you could cut barriers of your comfort zone, to going all out and becoming much confident facing everyone.
     
  13. Rea

    Rea Member

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    Always remember that self-confidence is something that you’ve earned and that nobody can take it away from you. You build self-esteem when people praise you for what you do and I don’t think it’s always necessary for some random compliments to make you feel good about yourself, is it? Otherwise, you would need constant approval from other people for validity, and that’s not a healthy way to live.

    You know who you are, and what you can achieve because you have proven it to yourself. Do not think otherwise because that’s what other people will perceive you to be as well.

    And in terms of boosting self-confidence, I know there are a lot of materials available online, but here’s a list of the things I do:

    - Maintain a good posture
    - Dress comfortably
    - Read more and speak up (widens knowledge especially vocabulary)
    - Get better on what you do (and take pride in it)
    - Do the things that need to be done now. Do not procrastinate.

    I hope this helps. :):):)
     
  14. bneil

    bneil Member

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    The key to becoming a completely confident individual is to believe in your self and to dream. Dream high and do everything that will make you reach it, it includes talking to hundreds of people, and asking for guidances, to be able to succeed we must take the initiative by taking one step ahead of our past self.
     
  15. marlinealcott

    marlinealcott Member

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    Confidence is a strange and complex thing. It isn't all black and white, and a person can have high self esteem but be less-than-confident (insecure) physically. I am that way. I absolutely believe in my abilities, and my mind, and my strength as a woman. I've traveled around the world by myself, started my life over from scratch in new places, written books and done all sorts of other things that I am very proud of.

    However, I struggle. I struggle daily with feeling ugly. Why? Because I have a health condition that leads me to have skin problems. Sometimes, severe skin problems, among other troublesome symptoms. If it wasn't for this health condition I think I'd be the most confident girl on the planet.

    It would be nice to say looks don't matter, and they don't, for some things. But unfortunately, most women want to be pretty, myself included. This is the one thing I battle with as far as my self esteem. I try and get through it by focusing on my writing skills, career, or other things that my skin can't hold me back from, but at times I become very depressed over this.

    I don't really have any tips because for me, all that has helped is not giving up on making my health better and having hope that my skin will be better one day.
     
  16. carlvennt

    carlvennt New Member

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    You got a perfect group of friends in your high school who inspired you to face up the challenges of life .First of all you have to belief in yourself that you can do anything and can face any challenge in life.Never feel disheartened.Every indivisuals are different from each other with different sets of quality,so you are unique in your own respect.



    ______________________________________
    self-help blog
     
  17. js14

    js14 New Member

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    (This explanation may not be as eloquent)
    Confidence is simply not caring what people think of you. Confidence is simply being detached from negative emotions/thinking.

    Confidence is simply saying:
    "I am happy and I am comfortable.
    I don't care what you or anyone think of me.
    I don't need to conform or live up to anyone's expectations but my own."

    I still remember my own personal growth and journey. People's opinion can be very hurtful, but then I reached a crossroad where I realized that it was only an opinion and nothing more. Whether it be true or false opinion, it's still my choice on how to feel and react.

    Being emotionally damage is your own choosing (this may be a harsh comment, but it is). It's a matter of detaching oneself. Boosting confidence through typical social norm - gimmicks (such as looking good and presentation), is not very effective. Not until you become detached, only then where true confidence will shine. ;)
     
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  18. Ryan Doug

    Ryan Doug Member

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    Based on my own experience, what makes me low of self confidence before is that I am afraid that people will reject me. I realized that I have been thinking negatively before and that caused me to drop my confidence. This is what I am about to say that we should not let ourselves be affected on what people are trying to say about us, and we should not think of negative things about ourselves. We can boost up self confidence by thinking that we have our own uniqueness and we should always have a good mind, and never allow any form of erroneous way of thinking. A good mind gives a good heart, and a good heart gives strength in facing any situation of the day.
     
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  19. bneil

    bneil Member

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    All people as I know based on a book i have read, about human psychology, people do tend to be afraid of rejection, but once, this is overcame you'll attain greater belief on your own skills and talent.
     
  20. Ryan Doug

    Ryan Doug Member

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    It's true! Once you overcome any situation in your life especially your being unbelieving to yourself, you will get the sense of being so strong deep within you. And I know once you are already strong with that, the same situation that come into your life, will no longer affect you.
     

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