What is Beauty?
Sight makes us blind to beauty
A reader has some questions about a paragraph I
wrote in the past:
"Beauty is an experience, not a label. In ordinary
conversation, when we say someone is beautiful, we imply that someone
else is ugly. Beware of labels because they prevent us from
experiencing reality directly. Sensory data reaching our brains are
not supposed to be filtered by prejudices.
Narrow-mindedness distorts perception and hinders
the joyful experience of life. The moment we drop all labels, we stop
seeing the world as we imagined it to be, and start experiencing it as
it really is: beautiful." (For the full article see:
http://www.personal-development.com/chuck/beauty.htm)
Q: Can you go into more detail about this?
A: Yes, I can. The subject is philosophical; yet, it
has practical implications. Since most of us are not accustomed to
sitting quietly and reflecting on life, a philosophical piece can be a
bit difficult to grasp at the first reading. So, I welcome this
opportunity to restate my ideas differently. Each repetition should
make the message easier to understand. I congratulate our reader for
his questions. You see, most people just abandon ideas they fail to
understand. It takes a wise and courageous person to question
unfamiliar ideas.
Q: Is it bad to tell someone they're
beautiful?
A: Absolutely not. To tell someone they're beautiful
is to tell them they're human, for everyone is beautiful. But not
everyone can see this simple fact. Others have said the same thing.
For example, Confucius (circa 551 ~ 478 BCE) reportedly said,
"Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it." Ralph Waldo
Emerson (1803 ~ 1882) expressed it this way, "Many eyes go through the
meadow, but few see the flowers in it." And Jeffrey C. Keene II wrote,
"All life is beautiful. All humans are beautiful. Only behavior makes
one ugly." What kind of behavior makes one ugly? Well, judging others
and calling them ugly is an example of ugly behavior.
Q: What does it mean that sensory data
should not be filtered by prejudice?
A: Imagine holding a delectable, tropical drink. You
place a straw in the glass and gently suck on the other end. As you do
so, a delicious stream of exotic fruit juices flows into your mouth.
Ah, the pleasure of it all! In this example, the straw is the tool
that allows you to experience the delightful drink.
Similarly, the purpose of sensory data (sounds,
sights, aromas, tastes, and the sense of touch) is to act as a bridge,
linking us to the wonder, beauty, mystery, and joy of life. But the
problem is rather than basking in the richness and grandeur of life,
we filter our experiences through the lenses of our opinions, beliefs,
and prejudices. For example, instead of welcoming the challenges of
the workplace or of family life, we complain that things are not as we
would like them to be. Rather than expressing gratitude for what we
have, we bemoan what we do not have. We reject a life of excitement
and adventure for one of mediocrity and misery.
Q: How do you know if you're being
narrow-minded or not?
A: That's easy. If you're unhappy that means you're
wearing blinders. Those blinders are the labels you stick on
everything.
For instance, when you say your job is TERRIBLE, you
are using a label that prevents you from seeing the opportunity your
job presents for your growth. Beware of labels, for they are easy to
put on, but hard to remove.
Q: If my feelings tell me something is not
beautiful, how can I argue with that?
A: That, too, is easy. If your feelings are telling
you something, that is emotional, but if you wish to make an argument,
you'll have to use logic, or the thinking part of your brain. So, what
do you want? To be ruled by your emotions or to take charge of your
life with rational thought? If I feel that 'fat' people are lazy, how
can I argue with that? Easy, try some logic. Are sumo wrestlers lazy?
Q: Am I supposed to pretend everything is
beautiful until my feelings change?
A: No, you're not supposed to pretend; you're
supposed to awaken. Awaken to what? Awaken to the facts. Haven't you
heard that beauty is in the eye of the beholder? So is ugliness. By
the "eye of the beholder," we mean the mind's eye or our imagination.
You see, ugliness does not exist "out there." It just exists "in
here," in our mind. It is an opinion and nothing else.
Q: How am I supposed to know if I can trust
my senses, then? If I can't trust the fact that I think something
looks ugly, what can I trust?
A: Don't confuse trusting your senses with trusting
your opinions. You can always trust your senses. They just provide you
with raw data, but you then process that data by running it through
your opinions, beliefs, and biases. For example, someone decides that
if women don't look a certain way, they are 'ugly.' That
conclusion does not come from raw sensory data, but comes from the
opinion of someone who is still asleep.
If we awaken our spiritual sense, we will conclude
that everything was created by a magnificent Creator. Therefore, we
will delight in all that is and find all of creation beautiful.
How can we deem anything in creation to be ugly? To do so, is to
simply reject what is. And this rejection is based upon arbitrary
standards that are used to judge the worthiness of what is.
To see ugliness is to be blind to the beauty in all
things, and is a failure to experience the magnificence and splendor
of life. If we see Betty as ugly, we don't see her at all.
Our view of her is obscured by the label of 'ugliness,' Who are we to
determine what is fitting or not? We are not the Creator. When we
reject what is, we place ourself above the Creator, imagining that we
are a better judge of what deserves to exist.
Bob thinks Betty is ugly, but it isn't Betty that is
flawed, it is Bob. Betty doesn't need plastic surgery; Bob needs
surgery of his opinions that, like cataracts, prevent him from clearly
seeing Betty's beauty. James Allen (1864 ~1912) has a way to see
beauty without surgery: "Let there be nothing within thee that is not
very beautiful and very gentle, and there will be nothing without thee
that is not beautiful and softened by the spell of thy presence."
I titled this article, "Sight makes us blind to
beauty" for a reason. You see, we do not see beauty with our eyes, but
with our heart. When you are excited, enthralled, and inspired by
someone, you will understand the true meaning of the phrase, "a
beautiful person."
If we cease wishing and demanding that life be other
than it is, we will find beauty everywhere. Epictetus (circa 50 ~ 130)
had something similar to say, "Seek not that the things which happen
should happen as you wish, but wish the things which happen to be as
they are, and you will have a tranquil flow of life."
If I had to summarize
everything in just a few words, I would say, everything is beautiful
if we love it. And all beauty is, is life loving us back.
|
